The more things change, the more they stay the same. Season 5 begins four and a half months after the end of season 4. Jackieâ€™s back at work after her union sued All Saints, there are two new doctors on staff, and Oâ€™Hara is finally back from maternity leave. Zoey still lives with Jackie, Eddie is still fired, and Coop and still Coop.
Since Jackieâ€™s about to have another birthday, she asks Kevin if she can have the girls. She knows itâ€™s not part of their deal but sheâ€™s hoping heâ€™ll make an exception this one time. Somehow I expected their relationship to be a little less hostile, but I can understand why it isnâ€™t. Jackie deserves all the hurt and anger and attitude heâ€™s throwing her way. But because Iâ€™m rooting for Jackie and hoping she can maintain her sobriety, Iâ€™m on her side in this fight. I know itâ€™s not his job to take care of her (or really care about her at all anymore), but I hope at least part of him can see that sheâ€™s trying.
At work, the staff is dealing with an influx of patients from a bus crash. Jackie, who is ecstatic to have Akalitus back as an administrator, laments the loss of Cruz â€“ for no other reason than theyâ€™re short staffed.Â Akalitus informs Jackie that sheâ€™s hired a new trauma guy, who will start the next week. Jackie suggests they might need him now and goes in search of Dr. Roman, the other new doctor. Sheâ€™s having sex in one of the empty patient rooms instead of all the floor of the ER where they need her. Suffice it to say, sheâ€™s not on Jackieâ€™s good side right now.
The bus full of gamblers landed on the Bentley of football player Elvis Page. Even though his body is a temple, he may have had some â€˜party favorsâ€™ in his car. He doesnâ€™t do drugs, but he likes to make sure his friends have a good time so he stuffed the drugs in condoms he happened to have on him and now theyâ€™re in his stomach. Elvis wonders if thereâ€™s any way they can keep it between them. And he quickly finds out Jackie wonâ€™t play that game.
The pharmacy machine is glitching and thereâ€™s a line of angry and frustrated staff waiting to get what they need. Jackie has recruited Eddie to get a laxative for Elvis, so he joins the queue if only momentarily. He breaks into the locked case of drugs and starts handing people what they need, but not before making sure a nurse helps him document everything theyâ€™re doing. He may be fired, but heâ€™s not stupid.
When Morris Chestnutâ€™s Dr. Ike Prentiss shows up for work, Jackie tries to stop him. She doesnâ€™t know who this guy is until he tells her. Sheâ€™s kind of impressed when he diagnoses a woman in the ER on the fly â€“ without even touching her. And later sheâ€™s impressed again when he uses his medical training from being deployed to help save another patientâ€™s life. But he doesnâ€™t let Jackie get away with her holier-than-thou attitude towards the patient. He made some racist comments, but Jackie canâ€™t deny she had preconceived notions about him too when he first arrived. Oh yeah, heâ€™s got enough attitude to fit right in at All Saints.
After spilling to everyone about Jackieâ€™s birthday â€“ even though Jackie warned her not to â€“ Zoey informs Jackie sheâ€™s ignoring her. And, of course, she canâ€™t stay silent for long. Zoey thinks maybe itâ€™s time for her to get her own space because she often feels like sheâ€™s encroaching. Jackie tells Zoey she doesnâ€™t have to leave, but sheâ€™s secretly happy when Zoey insists.
Jackie sees whatâ€™s going on with Roman and she doesnâ€™t like it. Not only does she rely on the nurses to do basic procedures she shouldnâ€™t learned by now, but Coop is letting it slip. Yes, sheâ€™s hot but that doesnâ€™t mean Coop should let her get away with what sheâ€™s pulling. And we all know how Coop gets when heâ€™s feeling threatened.
So when Coop goes for the boob grab, Jackie shuts him down and has a little talk with him. Later when they can see that Romanâ€™s, once again, relying too heavily on the nurses Coop steps in. Iâ€™m proud of him. And weâ€™re supposed to hate Dr. Roman, right? I mean to be more concerned with your silk shirt than your patient covered in glass shards is pretty heartless. But thatâ€™s just me.
Jackie canâ€™t believe one of her critical patients is still waiting for his tests. Akalitus informs her that she canâ€™t buy a new machine just because they canâ€™t get by with one. Itâ€™s then that Jackie sets her plan in motion. She returns to inform Elvis that his X-Rays are clear and that he can leave, but not before the cops have a talk with him. She tells him it was her duty to report what she knew, but she may be willing to change her story. If he buys the hospital a new CT scanner, heâ€™s in the clear. And it turns out those cops were never there for official reasons; they just wanted his autograph. In the end, Elvis is out $425K, but he heâ€™s not in jail and he got some great publicity for himself out of it. I love it when Jackie is crafty and devious, especially when sheâ€™s just doing it to help her patients.
Gloria is afraid what Eddie did is just a lawsuit waiting to bite her in the butt, so she claims she has no choice but to hire Eddie back. Awww. Iâ€™m so excited.
The only really bad news for Jackie (but great news for Oâ€™Hara) in this episode is her decision to be a full-time mom. She doesnâ€™t want her kid to resent her for never being there, especially when she has the money to do what she wants. I hated the way Jackie found out about it though. Jackie didnâ€™t get to finish telling her that she feels like Oâ€™Hara is the only thing standing between her andâ€¦ what? She didnâ€™t get to say because the nanny arrived with Oâ€™Haraâ€™s kid. But Jackie needs to be sober and stay sober for herself. She canâ€™t rely on anyone else to keep an eye on her, because thatâ€™s just setting herself up for failure. So despite this temporary setback, Oâ€™Hara leaving might be the best thing for Jackieâ€™s sobriety. Sheâ€™ll know what it feels like to do this on her own and thatâ€™s what will keep her sober.
We Need to Know
Whatâ€™s going on with Akalitus? She forgets Dr. Romanâ€™s name and she forgets to call the new trauma guy in, until Jackie asks about him. Â Iâ€™ve heard some things, but I donâ€™t want to give it away in case you donâ€™t know. Iâ€™m curious to see where this goes.
What They Said
Thor: “Elvis is in the building.”
Thor: “Elvis Page, number one draft pick. That bus crashed on top of his Bentley. Jaws of Life, the whole deal. Oh, if he’s injured, such a tragedy.”
Jackie: “If anybody’s injured, it’s a tragedy.”
Thor: “Hello. We’re talking Super Bowl.”
Elvis: “I asked you to keep this quiet.”
Jackie: “You might not want to get your stomach juices too angry.”
Elvis; “You always this nice?”
Thor: “To be fair, it’s her birthday tomorrow. And you know how women of a certain age can get.”
Jackie: “Eddie! Come here, I need you.”
Eddie: “Oh God. I love it when you say that.”
Jackie: “Oh God. Touch my tit, I will rip your hand off at the spine. Work on your boob-grabbing Tourette’s situation on your own time. For now on we’re gonna finish conversations.”
Coop: “And what is this conversation about?”
Patient: “How about I just wait for a doctor?”
Prentiss: “I am a doctor.”
Patient: “You f*cking kidding me?
Jackie: “Is there a problem, sir?”
Patient: “That doctor looks like a drug dealer.”
Prentiss: “And my patient looks like an a**hole. Can we just move on?”
Patient: “Those tattoos. People you’ve killed?”
Prentiss: “Actually they’re saves.”
Jackie: “Still want another doctor?”
Nurse Jackie airs Sundays at 9/8c on Showtime.
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