
Episode: “Dangerous Liaisons”
Writer: Caroline Dries
- “Drive much?”
- “Well, I believe we have a litlte catching up to do.”
- “What? How is she even alive? I thought her hybrid freak show of a son ripped her heart out a thousand years ago.”
- “Anyone else feeling a little used right now?”
- “Rebekah, tell me how handsome I am.” “Ah, Kol, you know I can’t be compelled.”
- “Oh go back to staring at yourself.”
- “Forgiveness is not a chore, it’s a gift.”
- “Can we go back in time to when the old Stefan cared if Elena lived or died?” “What for? That’s your job now.”
- “I’m out doing what he said. I’m going to fix myself and come home to you. I love you.”
- “It’s some twisted Cinderella fetish is what it is. And why does the Evil Queen want an audience with you?”
- “Well, I think a Salvatore would look a lot better in a tux.”
- “Hello, Carol. Hanging out with your new besties?”
- “Well at least you know who you’re borrowing that cup of sugar from.”
- “I’ve met a lot of people and you don’t particularly stand out.”
- “Good evening.” “I need a drink.”
- “It would be rude not to dance, you know.” “It is tradition.”
- “You look stunning if it isn’t obvious.”
- “You know, you’re quite the dancer.” “Well, I’ve had training. I happen to be Miss Mystic Falls.” “I know.”
- “Hmm…he dances. And I didn’t even have to beg.”
- “What are you doing? Why are you here with the she-devil?”

- “Took you about 30 seconds to put Damon in a mood.” “He’s just looking out for me.”
- “Stop staring. It’s creepy.”
- “Well, you’re no dog yourself.” “Was that supposed to be a compliment?” “You tried to kill Elena last night. You don’t get compliments.”
- “I’m not talking to you until you tell me why you’ve invited me here.” “I fancy you.”
- “And to answer your question, yes, I like horses. But I also like people and they actually like me. So I’ll be inside.”
- “I love my family, Elena, but they are an abomination. I betrayed nature when I created them. It’s my duty to kill them.”
- “Easy, buddy. Don’t want you doing anything stupid.”
- “Maybe you should stop being a controlling dick, Damon.”
- “You’re a liability brother.”
- “Yeah, well, your emotions are getting in the way of our plan.” “My emotions? How is this even happening right now?” “Maybe because you care too damn much.”
- “This is your car?” “Yup. If I could compel myself a Mazerati, I would. But I can’t.”
- “Oh, impressive. I take it that the creators of the Louvre aren’t on vervain?” “Yeah, well, that’s their mistake.”
- “I’ve never really been anywhere.” “I’ll take you. Anywhere. Wherever you want. Rome. Paris. Tokyo?”
- “I get it. Your father didn’t love you so you assume that no one else will either. And that’s why you compel people or you sire them or you try to buy them off. But that’s not how it works. You don’t connect with people because you don’t even try to understand them.”
- “Now you’re mad at me for including Stefan?” “No I’m mad at you because I love you.” “Well, maybe that’s the problem.” “No. That’s not what I…” “No — I got it, Elena. I care too much. I’m a liability. How ironic is that?”
- “You’re not having second thoughts, are you?” “Of course not. It’s just Elijah. He’s so moral.”
- “So, uh, Esther wants to kill her own family. How’s that for mother of the year?”
- “I said something I didn’t mean.” “So did I.”
- “If I let myself care, all I feel is pain.”

- “Hi. What are you doing?” “Well, let’s see. I went to a dance and got my hand crushed. Found out that I don’t have health insurance so I needed a minute to myself.”
- “Burn. Rejected by the captain of the football team. Welcome to adolescence.”
- “Besides…you would have broken him in a second.” “Are you suggesting I can’t be gentle?” “No, I’m just saying you should find someone a little more durable. That’s all.” “And who would that be?”
The Vampire Diaries airs Thursdays at 8/7c on the CW.
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