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What They Said

What They Said: Favorite Quotes from True Blood “Authority Always Wins” 

Photo Credit: HBO

Episode: “Authority Always Wins”
Writer: Mark Hudis

  • “Do something” “I am. I’m laughing.”
  • “Mr. Northman. You’re taller than I expected.” “I get that a lot.”
  • “I’ve no interest in being the new Packmaster. Or eating the old one.”
  • “Oh you just f–ked us!”
  • “Easy now, she just lost her son.” “She just ate her son!”
  • “Just get the f–k out.” “Gladly, psycho!”
  • “Stackhouse?” “Yeah?” “I had sex.” “Hey, welcome to the club!”
  • “You see, Christine, I will always be a Christian first and a vampire second.”
  • “And I’m here to tell you, Jesus loves vampires. I mean, anyone who’s been dead for three days knows where we’re coming from.”
  • “We can make a life for her. Even like this.”
  • “Jesus, Stackhouse. Have you had sex with every woman in this town?” “I don’t know, close, I guess.”
  • “You touch Holly I’m throwing your ass in jail.”
  • “The streets can be dangerous at this hour. A lady should really be more careful.” “If I meet a lady I’ll let her know.”
  • “It’s wonderful to be a vampire, isn’t it?” “Generally, yes. Now? Not so much.”
  • “Unfortunately, I cannot say the same for your um, your accomplice, Nora.” “She won’t leave here a free man?”
  • “Why endure this for him?” “I just really enjoy your company.”
  • “Long live the king.”
  • “Can I just say that before you became a vampire, you were a massive d–k.” “I know!”
  • “What do you want?” “Um, just a little chin-wag…in private.”
  • “Let me ask you a question, Steve. Have you seen Jason’s butt?” “Of course I’ve seen it. Why do you think I’m offering you 10,000 dollars?” “Well, it’s rock hard. You could chip a fang on it.”
  • “And speaking of…rock hard…let’s just say you won’t be disappointed.” “Okay, okay, $20,000.” “Look at you. Fang boner and…real boner.”
  • “Hair pulling? Really?”
  • “Thank you for splitting up Hoyt and that red-haired slut. I’m gonna bake you a pie.”
  • “I will never forgive either of you.”
  • “According to Nan Flanagan…what was it she liked to call you guys? ‘F–kup One and F–kup Two…'”
  • “We are the Authority. I am the authority.”
  • “Yeah, I am trying to stay away from politics as much as possible.” “Are you?” “And religion.”
  • “The only thing Russell wants more is to see us dead.” “Why?” “He pissed me off. Then I pissed him off. You know how these things go.”
  • “I feel like staking you so f–king much right now.”

True Blood airs Sundays at 9/8c on HBO.

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