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The Vampire Diaries “Break on Through” 

Photo credit: Photo: Quantrell D.Colbert/The CW

Wow, the CW promo monkeys get points for the windup.

Anybody who really thought they were going to see a threesome during the family hour on the CW, go sit down.

So, that didn’t happen. And honestly, there was a lot of that. Every year we get a spring episode that’s sort a tweener as the season sits on the precipice before its freefall into OHMYGOD! Think of it in terms of the hill at the top of a rise of a roller coaster. You get that moment to catch your breath before the BOOM (as our dear Daniel Gillies is fond of saying). So, I’ll hit the highlights, such as they were. This’ll be (a scoche) briefer than usual. You’re welcome.

We dispatched Alaric’s MacGuffin in one episode and I wonder if Matt Davis was disappointed that he didn’t get a few episodes to do his own twist on the ripper. The foray was plenty long enough for Dr. Fell, who he stabbed when he went dark side, but I’m getting ahead of myself.

Dr. Fell gives Alaric a CAT scan, during which he has a momentary glimpse of his dark side. The tests reveal nothing boogedy so Dr. Fell just keeps him sedated while they search for plan B. She finds out pretty quickly that’s a bad idea when he flips over to Antilaric and goes off on a rambling diatribe about remorse before he cuts her. She races upstairs and locks him out of the bathroom and then collapses in a bloody heap.

Earlier, Elena goes to fetch a book from the Salvatores and runs into Stefan, who tells her that Samantha Gilbert was still crazy without the ring, so they realize they need a magical remedy. She’s also a bit judgy pants about him feeding again.

Elena swallows her pride and calls Bonnie and Bonnie, being Bonnie, says she’ll come right away but she needs something of Alaric’s pre-magical undeading ring. He suggests his wedding ring, so Elena goes to his apartment to get it.

Once there, she meets up with Stefan again (I know) and they discover that Alaric had been at this a while, keeping trophies of his kills, and was baiting Jeremy to join the crazy. They race back to her house and Stefan knocks Antilaric out. Stefan gets a scent on the calamity upstairs and asks Elena come with him to help him. She’s puzzled about the why until they find Fell and he immediately vamps, but recovers his urge and feeds her to the point of recovery instead of feeding on her, so that’s a victory and Elena recognizes that.

Bonnie fixes Alaric with an herbal cocktail. We don’t see any detox, but Damon appoints himself Alaric’s rehab minder. A quick call from Elena to Jeremy at the end of the episode doesn’t really tell us much except that waking/non-zombie Jeremy said Alaric hadn’t contacted him, which may or may not be true.

Back home for Bonnie, Abby isn’t handling the transition at all well, despite Caroline’s tough love cheerleadering. After she bites Jamie, Abby decides it’s safer for her to split, so she does. So that news is still awaiting Bonnie when she gets home.

In the second arc,  Rebekah is still groping for clues about the White Oak bark, and ends up groping Damon (before and after he gropes Sage) to kill time, and Sage uses the opportunity to read Rebekah’s mind. We also find out that Sage is nutso for Flynn (her true love and the one Mikaelson son who was down with momma’s plan to wipe out the clan), so her discovery that the Wickery Bridge was chock full of Original Killing Bark leads her to turn right around and tell Rebekah so she can bonfire all of its dregs (or so she thinks) immediately.

But the Salvatores get on that when it turns out they still have enough bark from a commemorative Wickery Bridge sign to start over. Commence party planning!

And that’s where we leave the crew at the end of things as they wind up for the final push toward the end of the season. We have episode 18 this week, then a break for two weeks, and the final four (hee) episodes start April 19th and the finale airs on May 10th. Plan accordingly!

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