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What They Said

What They Said: Favorite Quotes from The Vampire Diaries “Homecoming” 

Photo Credit: Quantrell Colbert/The CW

Episode: “Homecoming”
Writer: Evan Bleiweiss

  • “Portland is fantastic once you get over the whiny music and healthy-looking people. It’s literally a breeding ground for werewolves.”
  • “You see a vampire can’t dagger an Original without dying so it falls to you.”
  • “Now was that easy or what?”
  • “You destroyed our family. Not him.”
  • “So don’t go. Let’s stay home, order take-out and over analyze ancient hieroglyphic thingys with Alaric.”
  • “We can’t trust Rebekah not to turn on us.” “Oh really? You know vampires are usually soooo reliable.”
  • “Well, I am formulating a secret contingency plan.” “Really? What is it?” “Well, if I told you then it wouldn’t be a secret.”
  • “I’m 162 years old and I’m going to a homecoming dance. I need better ties.” “You could not go,”
  • “You two have reason to worry but if I look back at our history of epic plan failures, it’s usually because one of us let our humanity get in the way.”
  • “I’ll see you at Homecoming. I can’t wait.”
  • “And secondly, quit hanging out with Rebekah the evil blood slut.”


  • “The big deal, Tyler, is that Matt is an innocent good person who should not be going to dances with evil blood sluts.”
  • “I’m here hanging streamers and have glitter all over my hands. If I’m sired to anybody it’s you.”
  • “My mother’s necklace.” “You should wear it tonight.”
  • “I’m so sorry. I can’t leave anything to chance either.”
  • “In the back. Harsh.”
  • “I’m not judging you. It’s very Katherine of you.” “Not the way to make me feel better about myself, Damon.” “It was a compliment. Sort of.”
  • “I’m the weak link.”
  • “Do you trust me?” “Yes.” “Then you have nothing to worry about.”
  • “Kegs and Beer Pong for Homecoming? That’s…different.”
  • “How did he plan a better party than me so fast?”
  • “It’s not a party, man. It’s a wake.”
  • “Plans changed. I need a drink.”
  • “Did my daughter go to the dance?” “Yup. You missed the photo op.”
  • “Fancy.”
  • “I’d offer you a drink but Katherine tells me you’re more of a vampire on the rocks kind of guy.”
  • “Why feed on vampires? Don’t tell me it’s for the smooth aftertaste.”
  • “You couldn’t just break his neck?” “Well, it certainly occurred to me.”
  • “You’re free to warn your friends.”
  • “You seem nervous.” I’m not nervous. I just don’t like you.”
  • “Invite only, vampire.” “Here’s my R.S.V.P., hybrid.”
  • “You’re not supposed to witchy migraine me!” “He tried to bite me!”
  • “Are you okay?” What do you think?” I’m sorry I stabbed you. It was the only think I could think of to get you out of there.” “Oh yeah? Not ‘Oh Caroline. Um. I’m worried about what might happen this evening so maybe you should just go home and watch Dancing with the Stars.”
  • “There you go. I saved you from your own stubbornness.”
  • “How am I supposed to be with you when you’re sired to him?”
  • “Understand that this is who I am. There’s nothing I can do about it. Klaus can’t be killed. I can’t be fixed. Understand that I’m okay with it.” “But how are you okay with it?” “Because it’s better. I don’t have to turn, Caroline. Not unless I want to. I never have to go through that pain again.”
  • “After everything that we’ve been through, you’ve been there for me through all of it. Don’t turn your back on me now”
  • “We’ll survive this. We always survive. Trust me.” “We’re never getting Stefan back. You know that, Elena.” “Then we’ll let him go, okay? We’ll have to let him go.”
Photo Credit: Quantrell Colbert/The CW
  • “You going back into hiding?” “At least my life’s not boring. Goodbye, Damon.” “Take care of yourself, Katherine.”
  • “He doesn’t know where it all went wrong.” “He doesn’t need to know.”
  • “If I die, I’ve already insured that he’ll die along with me. Even in death, my hybrids have their orders so you kill me, you’re killing me too.”
  • “Okay look, I know that you’ve turned off your humanity and that you don’t care so there’s only one solution.” “What’s that?” “Care, Stefan. Care enough to save Damon’s life.”
  • “I wasn’t just trying to save Damon’s life, Stefan. I was trying to save yours. Your humanity. Let’s just say I like the old you better.”
  • “I loved you. I loved Damon too.”
  • “I can’t let it all back in. I don’t want to. Not after everything I’ve done.”
  • “But if you don’t let yourself feel. You won’t be able to do what I need you to do next.” “What’s that?” “Get mad.”
  • “Daddy’s dead. It’s time for a family reunion.”
  • “I like to believe I’m a man of my word. More or less.”
  • “You know what never gets old? Revenge.”
  • “What’s the matter, Klaus. Missing something?”
  • “I will kill you and every one you’ve ever met.” You do that and you will never see your family again. I wonder, Klaus. As someone who’s been one step ahead for a thousand years, were you prepared for this?”

The Vampire Diaries will return with new episodes on January 5, 2012.

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