Relationship Recap: The Bravermans Have The Sex Talk 

How mortifying. Can you imagine your parents hearing you have sex because your phone has a mind of its own and decides to call them? YIKES. I am so glad Kristina decided not to tell Haddie how they knew she was having sex. But I am happy Haddie felt comfortable enough to confide in her mom. Yes, she denied it at first but I think it’s an instinct thing. If you think you’re doing something wrong, deny deny deny. But it seems like this is the right thing for Haddie. She loves Alex and ultimately it’s up to her when to get physical with him. But that’s not what I want to talk about. I want to talk about the emotional fallout of Haddie’s decision.

It will always (and should always) be a big deal when a girl loses her virginity. There is so much that’s wrapped up with all of that but I don’t want this to became a debate on whether or not Haddie was ready. I want to talk about how her parents deal with it. Kristina, while at first misguided, handles is so much better than Adam does. At first Kristina tells Haddie she waited until she was 22 to have sex, but later reveals she was actually 15. I think this is such an important moment in their relationship. It’s a real moment of connection between mother and daughter. Kristina could have maintained the lie but I’m not sure what that ultimately would have gotten her. I believe in having an open and honest relationship with your parents. I hope most young girls feel comfortable enough to confide in their mothers, especially when it comes to sex. It does our society no good to look the other way when it comes to this issue. But, I digress.

It’s interesting that Kristina (and maybe most, if not all parents) say one thing when they themselves did something else. Of course an adult will think they know better than their child. I think they’re genetically programmed that way but what’s great here is that Kristina really just wants to be there for her daughter. She doesn’t want Haddie to feel like she has to sneak around or lie, and I think that’s a good thing. Teens seem to get in the most trouble when they’re rebelling against their parents (hello Amber).

And what about Adam? He can’t even look Haddie in the eye. He doesn’t know how to react so he’s trying to give her space. But as Sarah reminds him, that’s not what kids need. When they’re trying to push you away you need to be there for them and not back off. When they don’t want to talk about something, you need to get them to vocalize what they’re feeling. And it’s not like Haddie didn’t notice his strange behavior. She was so upset that her father was treating her so differently. It did seem like he was punishing her and distancing himself from her. So it was a huge relief (to me and I’m sure to you too) when Adam went to pick Haddie up from soccer practice. I could see him trying so hard to make things ok and I’ve gotta give him points for that. The scene where he’s cleaning the scratch on her elbow? So sweet and so touching.

I think when parents make an effort to understand their kids it really pays off. Kids just want their parents to try to see things from their point of view. And Haddie’s a great kid; they’ve done a great job with her. Yes, she’s done some questionable things but ultimately she knows right from wrong. They’ve got to trust in their parenting skills and know she’ll make decisions based on what’s right for her.