Episode: “The End of the Affair”
Writer: Caroline Dries
- “You’re interrupting my drink.”
- “Katherine. Where are you?” “Lurking outside your window. Pining away.”
- “What have I missed?” “Well, Stefan’s still Klaus’ little prisoner and Elena still thinks she can save him and no one’s thought about you since you left.”
- “Is that what you’re doing? Looking out for my brother?” “Maybe. Maybe not. I’m conflicted.”
- “What is this?” “I told you, Stefan. Chicago is a magical place.
- “Rise and shine, sleepyhead.”
- “You know you were dreaming about me. Explains the drool.”
- “He’s in Chicago? How do you know?” “Came to me in a dream. I was naked. You would have loved it. Start packing”
- “Is he okay? Well, let’s just say he’s not there to meet Oprah. Ooh…put these in the “yes” pile.”
- “It’s an antique, Damon. Like you.”
- “I’m shocked! Stefan’s not a virgin?” “Eyes on the road, grandma.”
- “You gotta be kidding me.” “So. A hybrid walks into a bar and says to the…” “Stop. You may be invincible but that doesn’t make you funny.”
- “Stefan could live anywhere in Chicago and he chose this?” “There used to be an all-girls high school around the corner but it shut down for attendance issues. Weird.”
- “Here we are. Stefan’s second personality home.”
- “Stefan was a cocky ripper douche, but I could avoid him and still indulge in a few Daisy Buchanans of my own.”
- “So this is the famous Stefan Salvatore I’ve been hearing so much about. You’re right. He does have funny hair.”
- “And where’s the rest of your family?” “Well, let’s see. Um…I killed most of them.”
- “I was your number one fan.”
- “Gloria, damn! If I knew you were going to age like this, I would have stuck around.” “I always did like you better.”
- “I don’t think so. You may be cute but you’re still a vampire.”
- “Look what I found. 1918. Single malt.” “My favorite.” “Let’s go and find someone to pair it with.”
- “I told you that I was practically discovered by Klaus and you’re worried about what I’m wearing?” “I had an hour to realize what a bad idea it was to leave you here alone, process it and move on.”
- “Get dressed. You’re all road trippy and gross.”
- “So confused. If we were such great friends, why do I only know you as the Hybrid dick that sacrificed my girlfriend on an altar fire.”
- “I’m sorry but the fun has to end here.” “What are you talking about?” “You must forget Rebecca and me until I say otherwise. You never knew us, Stefan. Thank you. I’d forgotten what it was like to have a brother.”
- “You kill Andie one day, you save my life the next. What are you? Good? Bad? Pick one.”
- “She’s not going anywhere until she’s got you checked into vampire rehab and on the end, trust me. I’ve tried.”
- “Tell Elena to go home and forget about me.” “Tell her yourself.”
- “I see they’ve opened the doors to the riff-raff, now.” “Oh, honey, I’ve been called worse.”
- “Clearly you want to die otherwise you wouldn’t be here.” “What can I say? I’m a thrill-seeker.”
- “You want a partner in crime? Then forget Stefan. I’m so much more fun!”
- “I can’t give up on you, Stefan.” “Yes, you can. It’s done. That part of my life is done. I don’t want to see you. I don’t want to be with you. I just want you to go.”
- “Mom? Thanks for believing in me.”
- “Would now be a bad time to give you crap about sneaking out on me?”
- “Rebecca! It’s your big brother! Come out, come out wherever you are!”
- “Where are you?” “Why, do you want to come rub sunscreen on my back?”
The Vampire Diaries airs Thursdays at 8/7C on The CW.




